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05:37pm 05/03/2013
I had a doctor appointment today for these physical symptoms that have been coming along with my depression.  What I found out is that
[(click to open)]1) I cannot trust my doctor.
2) I'm getting migraine headaches due to allergies and congestion.  Great, just great.  I keep thinking my allergies are gone after all the allergy shots and the surgery but they just keep coming back to bother me in another form.  I cannot stop seeing Kitty… but at least I should keep from intentionally kissing her and inhaling her scent on the top of her head.
3) My chest region has been super sore for months due to some whacked out PMS, which has occurred because of going off my stupid thyroid medication accidentally and then going back on and the PMS has been making my depression worse.  The PMS has also apparently been making me hungry and super tired all the time.
4) I have to get an ingrown toenail cut to remove the growth or something by a podiatrist, who I have to go see next.  Ugh.
5) Blood tests are annoying.  Usually I don't mind so much but I was already irritated and my head was hurting too.  Times before I've had them try a few times to find a good vein, sometimes not getting one at all or other time getting air instead of blood.  This time, the nurse used the wrong needle so it took a loooong time to draw the blood.  They're testing for a lotttt of things and the results will come back Friday and I have to discuss them with the doctor on the phone.
6) The only help that doctors can give for depression is to try to send you to the hospital, which is utter ********.  I despise the hospital and it terrifies and infuriates me that people have the power in this world to send you to a place against your will and hold you there inhumanely and not listen to a word you say.  I have to be careful what I say and I can't tell the truth to a doctor and they can't make me feel better.  I am terrified of just the thought of being put into a hospital against my will.  Yet I cannot swear off doctors because of course I need to see them for my meds.  Thankfully, I have a therapist who I can trust not to call anyone on me (cause I also despise my psychiatrist) but even seeing her is beginning to annoy me because she just doesn't understand my culture.  Also, I feel like such a bad patient because I don't like what the doctors/therapists have to say to me and they always let me down.  I want to avoid my mom because I have to keep pretending and keep trying to keep things normal and keep trying not to cry.  It's a horrible situation in general.

I'm really struggling with one of my classes and I really don't know if I'll be able to pass - none of my classes ever have come this close to me failing.  Plus, I really need to pass this class because it's the only acceptable one that will meet the requirement.  I have to transfer come fall and I still need three more classes to finish.

I need to quit following rules so much, lol.  I haven't been going to classes at my gym that have been marked as you needing to sign up for them and I've missed out on bunches of classes because I just asked and the guy told me that it's a dollar fee to sign up and usually the classes don't fill up anyway, aaargh.  This shouldn't be such an annoyance but it is.  This has happened a few other times with me not doing things because I'm trying to follow the rules.  *eye roll*

I haven't been able to motivate myself to do exercise at home, which is strange.  I've been trying to go to cycle and kickboxing classes at the gym, which is good because then I exercise for a full hour instead of just doing 30 mins which is all I can do by myself on the cardio machines at the gym.  Now I was actually thinking of trying out doing free weights at the gym by myself instead of staying home and doing a workout video.  That way, I can maybe do weights and then do some cardio.  It will also keep me away from home so much.  But today it's too late - 5:30pm is when it gets really crowded.

*sigh*  My head hurts even after a steam with eucalyptus oil and warm tea and I am just so tired.  Going to try to do some weight training now anyway.  If anyone knows any particularly effective natural home remedies for sinus migraines, let me know.
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The fiasco continues  
10:00am 23/01/2012
Originally posted by electricdruid at The fiasco continues

ACTA in a Nutshell –

What is ACTA?  ACTA is the Anti-Counterfeiting Trade Agreement. A new intellectual property enforcement treaty being negotiated by the United States, the European Community, Switzerland, and Japan, with Australia, the Republic of Korea, New Zealand, Mexico, Jordan, Morocco, Singapore, the United Arab Emirates, and Canada recently announcing that they will join in as well.

Why should you care about ACTA? Initial reports indicate that the treaty will have a very broad scope and will involve new tools targeting “Internet distribution and information technology.”

What is the goal of ACTA? Reportedly the goal is to create new legal standards of intellectual property enforcement, as well as increased international cooperation, an example of which would be an increase in information sharing between signatory countries’ law enforcement agencies.

Essential ACTA Resources

  • Read more about ACTA here: ACTA Fact Sheet
  • Read the authentic version of the ACTA text as of 15 April 2011, as finalized by participating countries here: ACTA Finalized Text
  • Follow the history of the treaty’s formation here: ACTA history
  • Read letters from U.S. Senator Ron Wyden wherein he challenges the constitutionality of ACTA: Letter 1 | Letter 2 | Read the Administration’s Response to Wyden’s First Letter here: Response
  • Watch a short informative video on ACTA: ACTA Video
  • Watch a lulzy video on ACTA: Lulzy Video

Say NO to ACTA. It is essential to spread awareness and get the word out on ACTA.

Via Tumblr

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Fic: Touchable  
03:37pm 12/12/2011
Title: Touchable
Author: Rottweiler7692
Word Count: 2700+
Rating: PG
Warning: references to suicidal ideation but the focus is on drunk!Jensen
Summary: J2 AU.  It’s a tradition for Jensen’s friend Chris to help get him tipsy on his birthday every year to get through the day.  This year, they go too far and Jared learns that Jensen is very touchy and open when he’s drunk, much different from his usual shy personality that Jared has only caught glimpses of in their shared classes.
(Touchable... aka drunk!Jensen fic)Collapse )
tags: j2 rps
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Fic: Warmth and Steve  
12:35pm 08/12/2011
Title: Warmth and Steve
Author: Rottweiler7692
Rating: G
Word Count: 600+
Summary: Chris wakes up in the middle of the night to Steve not being in bed with him.  So half asleep, he goes and brings him back and makes things go back to the way they’re supposed to be.
A/N: Written as a reward for deanangst at fit4kane.
All is quiet...Collapse )
mood: thirstythirsty
tags: kane rps
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Fic: Special Moments  
07:29pm 14/09/2011
I wrote this for sarmsank's prompt, happiness, at fit4kane.

Chris/Steve, PG, 777 words

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tags: kane rps
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Fic: Untitled (lifeguard!Jared, lonely!Jensen)  
12:18pm 31/08/2011
For the

The J2 Summer Break Meme
Prompt: Hot lifeguard Jared is very curious about the lonely guy on the beach - Jensen - who reads and writes all the time.
PG, 2800 words
(Woohoo, I actually finished this and am pretty satisfied with it.)

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mood: nervousnervous
tags: j2 rps
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Fic: Lip-Locked Life  
02:24pm 11/08/2011

Title: Lip-Locked Life

Author: rottweiler7692 

Pairing: Jensen/Jared

Rating: PG

Word Count: 1420

Summary: AU.  Kisses are his redemption.

A/N: For pippii .  Thank you bb. 

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mood: moodymoody
tags: j2 rps
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Fic: The Best Four Years Chapter 16-17  
02:49pm 29/07/2011
[For info such as rating/summary/word count, see Masterpost]

The Best Four Years Chapter 16-17Collapse )
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Fic: The Best Four Years Chapter 13-15  
02:47pm 29/07/2011
[For info such as rating/summary/word count, see Masterpost]

The Best Four Years Chapter 13-15Collapse )
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Fic: The Best Four Years Chapter 10-12  
02:45pm 29/07/2011
[For info such as rating/summary/word count, see Masterpost]

The Best Four Years Chapter 10-12Collapse )
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